― Steve Maraboli
There are a lot popular sayings in the American Vernacular that sound great and seem like great ideas, but how the heck do we accomplish them?
“Just Let Go!” is one of them. “Don’t give away your Power!” is another we often hear. Truth be known, these nuggets of wisdom are invaluable in order to live a life that makes sense, if we could only wrap our mind and spirit around understanding what they really mean. It’s a fact, life is going to throw you situations and people that will attempt to drive you nuts, or at the very least cause you to have negative emotions you’d really rather not experience. If given the choice. Here’s the best news of the day: you do have a choice. Whether you make it is up to you. If we don’t learn to practice letting go and being in control of our personal power by learning to tap into the power of “and so what,” our emotions will have us playing games we wouldn’t dream of engaging another person in. Accepting the notion that things usually happen for a reason, even if we don’t understand why at the time it’s happening. For me personally, this past month has brought one frustrating situation after another that caused me feelings I wouldn’t choose for myself in a million years. But I did. And so it is. They happened, they are happening, and unless I want to end up incapacitated by illness and exhaustion from stress, I have had to stop grinding my teeth and implement both of these mind-sets. Just so you know, and so you don’t think I am on my high horse, I had a total melt-down first. That didn’t feel so good, so I dug deep in my spirit woman and reminded myself of my own three magic words…. “and so what?” Remember this: You were born to be successful, born to win, born to live in joy, but only if we take ourselves out of the game with our opponents.
Crazy-makers aren’t operating from any kind of spiritual place. On the contrary. It’s their journey, let them go on it, you don’t need to go on it with them.
Life is the only game we can win by getting OUT of the game. We can do that mentally and physically. What does this look like? Getting out of the game means that we stay focused on our God instead of our problems. We stay focused on our peace instead of the crazy-makers in front of us. It means that even though we may believe we are right, we don’t have to prove it. It means that we can say “and so what” (in our head) and get some satisfaction knowing that by simply not engaging, we are winning. What’s in it for us? What’s the prize? Our peace. Our power. Our sanity. Our joy. Our focus, and our future.
“And so what” if my co-worker, friend, partner, family member, (fill in the blank) is trying to cause me unnecessary drama and chaos? We can choose not to engage. As much right as they have to act out, I have just as much right to blow it off. If we can stay calm by taking our emotions out of the situation, and allow our mind to refocus on the power that God gave us to choose his peace rather than someone’s chaos, who are we not to take the prize? What better way to take our power back than by stopping, taking a few deep breaths, claiming our calm, managing our emotions, and using our core spirit man/woman to take over the situation? What would God have us do? I believe he would prefer us to take ourselves out of the game and focus on where we’re going rather than what the goal of the crazy-maker is, and that’s to keep us from moving forward by keeping us stuck in anger, hurt, disbelief, frustration, and negative feelings. When you take your emotions out of the situation, you can think from your spirit person, rather than your human being. This doesn’t happen overnight, until you decide it’s going to. Let crazy-makers go. Bless them and keep moving forward. It’s your Divine right. Sometimes you will even have to remove yourself from the situation, but if you can’t, remember, you can always escape by taking your self mentally, and emotionally out of the game, even while still standing in the same room. It just takes practice.
Learn to live this practice as if your sanity and health depends on it, because it does.
A new year is coming soon, let’s make it the year you learn some new ways to take your life back. If you have any questions, I’d love to hear from you. Leave your comments below and I will answer.
Love and Blessings,
Cat
6 comments
Right on! Thank you Catherine for saying exactly how I’ve felt the past few months! It has taken me 20 years to learn how to win and be proud of my reactions to loved ones behaviors. Thank you also for admitting the break down moment. I had that first but did not act upon what I call my " just you wait Henry Higgins just you wait!" feelings. You are so right. Feel it, get over it, breathe and don’t do or say anything you’ll regret. We will be better off if we keep the initial emotions out of our reactions! We need to keep our energy for the positive and focus on those who do right by us. It’s so much better for our bodies and souls. We don’t need to feel temporarily awful AND look foolish! Cheers to being graceful and peaceful this holiday season.
You are speaking to my heart, Catherine! I have printed out a few of my favorite inspirations of yours and put them on my bulletin board and read them often. It would be great if you could put these in a book—Chicken Soup for the Soul, Cat style! Thank you for the way you treat everyone.
There is a great song from the 80’s that Barry Manilow sang called “All The Time”
All the time I thought, there’s only me, crazy in a way, that no one else could be. I would have given everything I owned if someone could have said, you’re not alone. All the time, all the wasted time, all the years, waiting for a sign, to think I had it all, all the time" And those lyrics sum it up. We really have it all, but experiences, people putting their “stuff” on us, things that are said to us on the way to forming as functioning human beings, all of that can affect the way we relate and lack of strong boundaries. Saying no is okay. Walking away from situations that aren’t healthy is okay. Doing what we want to do, and not expected to do, is okay. I am loving the comments. Thank you for sharing
Cat, you hit the nail on the head. In the past few months, I have been learning to let things go. You helped teach me that! I’ve learned to just walk away from the drama & have peace. The drama can effect your health if you let it creep in. I refuse to be someone’s emotional punching bag. No more! I sleep so much better now! No regrets!!
Eldona
Thank you so much for sharing this.